It’s interesting what a big hunk of rock can teach you when it comes to gender stereotypes.
Husband and I recently decided to upgrade our kitchen countertops, replacing the Corian with slab granite. The project has grown in scale proportionate to The Money Pit. The domino effect takes your breath away. New countertops also means a new sink, new faucet (and trappings), new cooktop, and everything else that trickles down from there.
I called home the other day from Austin and heard Husband declare, “We’ve decided to put tile up the walls for backsplash.” Since I didn’t remember discussing the topic, I presumed he meant either the royal “we,” or a pre-arranged agreement with the dog. Whichever the case, it was fine with me. I am blessed with an artist for a husband, a man with impeccable taste. While we work as a team on projects like this, I have no qualms about having him choose every element - the result is guaranteed to be gorgeous.
Catching up by phone the next day, I was surprised to find a frustrated and despondent husband. “They wouldn’t sell me any tile.”
“What do you mean, they wouldn’t sell you any tile?”
“Just what I said... the salesman ignored me. Then, he did everything to put obstacles in the way... said I had to hire someone to measure the kitchen, even though I had meticulous measurements with me. I even told him I’d pay extra to order enough tile to cover breakage AND to have their guy come out and measure. All I wanted to do was order the f*****g tile and he wouldn’t let me! Then, when I asked him another question, he walked away from me... went over to a lady that was staring at tile samples.”
By now, I was starting to get P.O.’d myself, but then stopped. “You know why, besides being a jerk, this guy didn’t sell you tile, don’t you?”
“Why?”
“Because you were by yourself.”
I could picture it... Husband wheeling his shopping cart around Expo, transporting the cabinet door he takes with him everywhere to compare samples. I’m willing to bet he started the conversation with, “My wife and I are re-doing our kitchen...”
From there, he was screwed.
Looking back at our other encounters during this project, I remember being struck by the fact that sales reps often assumed I was making all the decisions, that my husband was a decorating dolt and was just along for the ride. Were they nice to him? Absolutely. But did they take him seriously? Most of the time, no. It was rather surreal - kind of like watching a car buying experience in reverse.
It’s also a rotten way to market to women. You see, women don’t live in a vacuum. Often times, a woman’s loyalty to a brand stems from the way that brand treats the people around her, not just her. I love my husband and am protective of him, therefore I take umbrage at the way any salesperson treats him. The salespeople may have been reacting to general broadbrush experience, having the woman in charge of decorating. But it’s not good enough to rely on that. The best brands have employees who are hypersensitive to all unique situations... that is what builds a cult brand.
In the end, we have our tile ordered (thanks to a second visit to Expo, me in tow, and a different salesperson). We’re looking forward to the day when we no longer have to use plywood as a dish drainer and can find the box that holds the silverware, now that the cupboards have been emptied for construction.
Hmmm... cupboards. Hadn’t thought of that. They do look a little shabby.
Honey, what are “we” thinking about the cupboards?...
That really gets my blood boiling. Poor customer service is always frustrating. The sales rep that your husband was interacting with was not very good at qualifying him before he blew him off...
Making assumptions about people and their buying habits with out due process is dangerous for a business. One can never tell how well-off or versed on the subject matter a prospect is until there are questions asked and customer engagement.
I guess some other sales person will be helping to make your kitchen a beautiful place.
Posted by: Kristina | October 26, 2006 at 03:46 AM
If you thought that was fun try going into an implement dealer knowing what you need but the man behind the counter thinks he knows more. I feel your husband pain!!!!
Posted by: Melissa | October 26, 2006 at 08:15 AM
I can totally sympathize. Planning 'our' wedding earlier this year WE faced the same thing. My hubby was a star at taking on a lot of the decision making but like your husband found that service providers weren't that eager to talk to him. It was incredibly frustrating, especially when I was with him and made it clear that hubby was the one to talk to...they still tried to sell to me. The day came together just fine but it really opened my eyes to gender biased customer service.
Posted by: Kathryn Lagden | October 27, 2006 at 05:10 AM
I have personally faced the same problem when going into hardware stores. I am not approached as often or as energetic as the men are. I have extensive customer service experience so to be treated this way really frustrates me. It is the salesperson's dedication, superior service and conduct that will enhance the company's image to the public. One bad experience could taint the reputation of the company. A company must hire the best people and educate and empower them to satisfy each and every customer regardless of gender.
Posted by: Olga | December 06, 2006 at 02:29 PM